Splintered
by Ravens Lament
Summary: When something happens to Hermione that splinters her world, who will be able to find the pieces and put them back together? It's a really bad summary, but better story.
1. I

Hi, thanks for taking a gander.

Chapter warning: Anyone who is squicked by vague sexual abuse, please do not read this chapter. This story is a psychological rebuild of a character, and therefore it is necessary to have the background.

Disclaimer: Not mine, never was. If it was mine I would've kept a certain-snarky-someone away from the drooling public. So J.K.R. must not love controlling, pessimistic, and handsome.

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Hermione Granger sat on the window sill in her safe room, hoping against all hope that Death Eaters would come and kill her. She had realized a long time ago that demons existed in the Muggle world and the magical world. Demons for lack of a better word were described to her as people so vile, people so detestable that humanity denied its presence in their creation. There were many examples of demons, but only two that she had been in contact with and two that she could say with all certainty were undeniable in their position. Voldemort was one of them. Her father was the other.

Her father went from the perfect, for lack of a better example, soccer dad to the foulest demon that she had ever seen. Voldemort would actually be preferable because at least he would eventually end her existence. No, with her father she just had to endure it and live with it. Live everyday like nothing was amiss, talk and laugh with her friends when expected. It had started when her mother got sick enough to have warranted two weeks in the hospital on Hermione's summer vacation. Her father had come in the first night her mother was there. He was reeking of alcohol, and he used her. Used her in the most vile way a parent can use their child, for sex.

First it was inconsequential-it may not sound like it, but it was compared to what it progressed into later.

It began when he pressed his hands where they did not belong, then he pressed his mouth to where it did not belong and finally he pressed himself onto her and took her virginity when she was thirteen years old.

She was twelve when the abuse started, now she was seventeen and it was still going on. It killed her to know that she was nineteen by wizard standards, but she couldn't say anything about that. Hell, it was killing her little by little anyway, why not add that?

For five years this had gone on behind her mothers back. However, only now, after her parents procured a divorce and her father granted custody on a technicality, it was bound to escalate. Before, it was once a day when it could've been hidden, and god, she had dreaded that when it came. Now however, there were no time limitations and the medications he was taking made it last longer. Therefore she couldn't pretend it didn't happen as thoroughly as before.

She hoped beyond rationality that Harry would focus on her father as opposed to Voldemort. Because she knew in her heart of hearts, that she hated the bastard, but, he was her father and she loved him, too. She had started to believe her father´s reprimands, that this was all she was good for, that she would never amount to anything. She had always been a '_know-it-all' _but she had thrown herself into her studies with renewed fervor after the abuse had started, the only rebel movement she had in her to complete.

She would be able to get away this year but, what would it matter, if this was all she was good for anyway.

It was just better to get things out of it. Everything she wanted that she actually got she would basically run a tab for. The point came when she hated herself enough to spend time in her generic living room rather than her bedroom because everything there was bought with _'favors'. _Pictures were thrown out, dark curtains were bought, and now she had her own fortress._ In her fathers mind every time he let her go out was a favor_ so daytrips to the burrow were few and far between also.

He was over an hour late, and some irritating part of her was wondering if he had gotten into an accident. The roads were slippery. The part that harbored this particular thought was not sad, not filled with dread, but gleeful.

She was pulled from her reverie when a black Saab 9-3 se turbo came up the driveway irritatingly unscathed. She watched her father get out of the car with a bag from the local market.

"Hermione!" He yelled as she grudgingly ripped herself away from the window.

"Yes, Dad?" God, how she dreaded it, but she had to separate the man into two different parts. Her father and her _'customer'._

"Put the groceries away and start dinner while I take a shower." He yelled up to her, growing coming close to her room. She tensed, then relaxed as he kept going past her door. She put away the groceries, almost throwing away the ground beef because it lay next to a package of condoms. It was a bulk pack of a hundred and now while he was safely holed up in the upstairs bathroom, she allowed herself to heave into the trashcan. Nothing came, nothing ever did. It wouldn't leave her, just clung to her ribs until her breath was scarce, instilled itself in her heart until she didn't have to publicly feel, and stuck to her emotions guaranteeing she would break, even if there was no one around to witness it, every single night.

Slipping into the living room was a routine for her, he would come, get her anyway and she didn't want him in her room. She didn't allow anyone in her room, not her true room. She had gone far enough to convert her bedroom into a sitting room, and her closet now served as a bedroom. Sometimes not even herself. Nothing could tarnish the safe haven of the large closet. She had set up a twin bed with only three photographs. Harry, Ron, and surprisingly enough. Severus Snape. God how she loathed everyone during summer, but had a sort of grudging respect for those three.

Harry, because he was an orphan, an only child. He had the best of both worlds in her opinion. No parents to be scared of and a guaranteed future.. Ron, because he went absolutely invisible compared to his large family. Professor Snape was particularly the most precariously balanced one. He was rotten and mean, but he spied for Voldemort. He had a woe is me´ air about him, but wanted none of it. He went through things worse and similar to the things she had to write down as everyday life four years ago.

Her father entered the living room after finishing his plate. "Are you ready?" he asked standing in the doorway.

"I guess." She said while trudging up the steps.

It was only at the very end of the summer that things got worse. She was cleaning out her closet in the afternoon when HE was gone from work and came across a small navy calendar. It had what she owed him to date. The last was a high number that made Hermione gasp once again.

Her father came home that night at the usual time and once again asked her for one of the things she owed him. She grit her teeth and withstood the pressure. He had taken pain medicine which would keep him going for over an hour. She was lying on the bed with her father on top of her trying not to cry one moment. She heard a floorboard protest as someone heavily walked on the floor outside the room. When she tried to push the demon off of her he almost snarled, and went back to his business. Hermione had lost the battle with her tears long ago and was now lying limp, letting them drip down her face. She had finally learned to tune out everything, and this was her just releasing herself from the blinding agony and debilitating rage. She had finally been able to detach herself from her emotions when she saw two feet and a long black travelers cloak enter her view.

She only had a moment to hope "Please. No, anyone but him.…"

Then her hopes were shattered.

As the man started speaking, her father turned his head. "Miss Granger, I'm going to assume…" He cut himself off when he recognized her father. She heard more than saw the man move, then her fathers weight was thrown off of her.

She scrambled quickly, lifting the sheet to cover her naked lower half.

__

Be careful what you wish for,

she thought, _I wanted a Death Eater to come and rescue me. Well, damn me for not being more specific. _She felt dead. She had always expected that, once this happened, she would feel free. But now that it did, she was numb, emotionless, and just felt like she was dead.

When the man who had rescued her, approached her, she expected to feel happiness or hopefulness, but all that she felt was an increasing feeling of dread, and she let it pull her down. She saw him kneel down, but she made no move to recognize it, instead she turned her head towards her father.

He was currently slumped down against a wall, his eyes frozen in horror. She knew the spell, a simple petrifying spell. His chestnut hair in disarray, and blood was slowly slipping down the left corner of his laugh lined mouth. She saw movement out of the corner of her eye and turned back to her savior in time to see him send a _patronus_ charm. She saw his mouth move, but heard no sound, he had obviously sent it to alert other people, and that brought a reaction. She wrapped the sheet around herself and bolted. She prayed to get to her safe room before the man got to her, before his message was received and people started showing up. The pitying looks upon their faces would be too much, she would break, she was sure she would.

She ran, ran only to be captured by her savior. She struggled, fought with all her might against the body which held her like a room with no doors. Until she finally gave up, stopped fighting, and just sobbed. She clung to the sheets just as tight as she held to the now unresponsive person who, a moment ago, was struggling to keep her put. She heard footsteps like a herd and she turned her head in horror. The Headmaster had come, followed closely by McGonagal, then her two best friends, some of the Weasley clan, then Lupin. She cursed herself, she should've listened, should've talked to the one person who wouldn't have given her the look which now resided upon the secondary rescue parties faces. The one who'd saved her, Professor Snape.

Only the headmaster was close enough to look into the bedroom she had run from. He was the only one close enough to see her attacker. He looked into the room only to hiss to Arthur. "Take the children downstairs."

That of course provoked responses. Hermione could hear the protests but couldn't make them out, they all had come at once.

"Take them downstairs. Now! Do what you must, but they are not to come up here." Dumbledore said in a way that left no refusal possible, and Arthur immediately brought all the children downstairs.

She could make out Ron, Harry, Ginny, Fred and George all being pushed down the staircase despite their now muttered protests.

She had stopped crying, although she didn't know when, but was still clutching her professor and the sheet just the same.

Lupin and Molly stepped up at the same time and both looked into the bedroom. Lupin growled, but Molly looked at her with a more sorrowful expression than before. She turned her head towards the stiff potions master. Breathing in his spicy sent and feeling him tense again, was enough to bring her back to herself, and she let go of him only to run to her room. She heard Professor Snape attempt to catch her again, but this time Dumbledore stopped him. She slammed through her room into the closet. She broke mirrors, turned off the lights and drew curtains. Then she was safe. She let a small sad smile grace her lips as the pitch black enveloped her. She always managed to smile when the pain came. It reminded her she was among the living.


	2. II

**_A/N: Not mine, never will be. Just an updated re-edited chapter. Added in a bit at the beginning._**

He trudged through the dungeons; there was really no other word for what he was doing at the moment. Normally he prided himself upon swooping, skulking, or creeping. He wasn't trying to sneak as the abundance of student's wouldn't be there until next week.

It'd been a fortnight since they'd retrieved Miss. Granger, and the girl was truly an enigma. When he had been sent to her house it had been to tell her about the outcome and subsequent ending of an anti-climactic battle. When he'd arrived however… plans swiftly changed.

At first, when he'd walked into the room he'd assumed that a stupid girl was making a stupid mistake, but then he saw a receding hairline, and aged skin. For a split second he was surprised that someone as young as she would take on someone that old. When he saw tears slipping down his students' face he took a second look at who was above her. He recognized the man. He'd searched the darkest corners of his mind to place a name with this face. When he had, he shook with rage; he'd grabbed onto the older male and yanked. His wand was had been in his hand before he'd had time to think. He'd barely been able to stop himself from casting an unforgivable; he did however cast a stupefying spell, then one to close the man's trousers. He'd looked at the brightest student of Hogwarts and saw an empty shell. After she refused to talk to him he'd done the first thing he thought of and summoned the headmaster.

They'd left after the auror's came for Mr. Granger and he heard Potter telling her the news of Voldemort in meek tones. Neither knew exactly what had happened, just that she'd been attacked. The headmaster had taken her aside and told her about what was going to happen to her father.

She was finally free, but she didn't even acknowledge the fact, and she went on exactly as she had since they'd left her house: Barely living. Two weeks and still no change in her demeanor.

Snape was the only one who noticed the faraway look in her eyes, but even he could not understand why she began smiling when that little dimple appeared in her brow. That particular appearance was telling that she was reliving a world full of pain; a world Snape resigned himself to in the lonely embrace of the moon. She only truly allowed herself to feel when she thought no one was looking, and composed herself a brief time after. She was always keeping the masochistic smirk on her face, like a child clinging to a security blanket.

However, the absolute kicker for her was mealtimes. She would come to the meals with a longing look on her face, then she would only eat a few bites before she deemed herself full. She enjoyed the pain that twisted her stomach, he could see that, but she was making herself sick. Even Poppy had given up treatment of her, had finally listened to the girl´s screamed protests. Though, Snape decided, that in this case Hermione's eating patterns were the cause for the countless arguments from the chit, they would show up on the scans.

Dumbledore, the meddling fool that he was, had ordered him, of all people, to keep an eye on the girl. Why? She only speaks when spoken to, even to the other two thirds of the save-the-wizarding-world trio. If she was going to open up, she wouldn't do it to him. After three weeks no progress had been made by anyone who'd made the unfortunate attempt.

A ward announced the breaking of his potion stores and he left for the brief walk towards the offensive sound. Not realizing exactly what was taken, he did an inventory check.

Six obvious ingredients were missing:

1.) Mandrake Saliva

2.) Doxy Venom

3.) Flatworm Coagulant

4.) Newt Eyes

5.) Phoenix Tears

6.) Male Unicorn Horn Powder

Slipping through the list of potions that required these ingredients, he quickly realized there were only two combinations this could produce that he knew of, the first an abortifactant, and the second a poison.

He quickly looked through his stores and found an anti-emetic was missing as well. He checked his wards, and the name of the intruder hit him like a ton of bricks: Hermione J. Granger. The chit was trying to kill herself? He swirled and started to walk, not turning when the stiff material of his robes knocked over vials. He was going faster every step he took, and it barely took him five minutes to arrive at her dorm. He used the universal password the headmaster had given all of the teachers, and was confounded with the scene that met him.

Hermione was basking in the moonlight on a transfigured window seat. The small raw iron diamond patterns shadowing parts of her. A pained smile rested on her face as tears accompanied it, and she was wearing a twilight blue negligee. It draped across her lean frame and had a slit showing an unhealthy portion of her milky thigh. Black lace accents touched her throat, arms, and legs, highlighting most of all, her collar bones.

What stopped him cold was that it was almost a duplicate image to his last of his late mother. Even the song she had been playing in the background. It was the hopeless music that was favored by the unequivocally depressed.

She even looked up just the same as his mother had, with a blank expression that bore right through him. He, however, was not the same. He'd be damned if history repeated itself on a seventeen year old girl. He stalked forward, and whereas his mother had remained passive, recognition and defiance bloomed on her face just before he grabbed her by the shoulders.

He forced her to her feet, and kept his blazing eyes on her face. "What have you done?" he growled.

She cowered, "What are you talking about?" It came out as a breathy whisper.

"I know you've stolen from me. I ask again, what have you done?"

"I've done nothing you wouldn't do in the same situation." she said, her tone thick with righteous indignation .

"You stupid child." Snape said, before clamping his hand on her shoulder and forcing her to hastily walk towards the dungeons. He knew there was really no one to see them in the halls, and having it still be summer seemed in his favor tonight. He could admit to himself that she was a woman. A naive woman, who would've been a child before the adult body sprouted and adult problems piled on, but a women none-the-less.

He forced her into his private rooms, then quickly routed through his personal stores. He finally located what he was searching for. Then quickly thrust the small vial at Hermione. "You will take this." he said in a voice that left no room for deviance.

She glared at him as she raised the vial to her lips. After she swallowed the clear liquid, she felt small pinpricks in her abdomen, and for a moment she thought he understood. Until, he thrust a bucket at her. Soon her stomach twisted and wrenched, she doubled over and expelled a mixture of bile and chime. The contents of the bucket were colored teal due to the potion she had taken with the aforementioned stolen ingredients.

"Miss Granger, correct me if I am wrong. However, was it not your first year that I mentioned to never make use of a potion that is not the correct color? Even Longbottom takes heed to that warning."

"Sir," she responded, anger wound like a tight coil apparent in her tone "you are mistaken in the potion I brewed."

"The ingredients you've so impertinently taken along with the anti-emetic. No, I don't believe I mistook the Venenum potion."

She looked at him for a moment with a puzzled expression on her face, and then laughed bitterly. "You think I would steal from you to poison myself? You think I would risk a trip to Azkaban in the event of this such a possibility, for something as inconsequential as my death? You think I would procure ingredients that I'm barely allowed to look at, none the less touch, for a poison? No, _sir_. I am going to take advantage of your intelligence for a moment; I have successfully brewed and subsequently taken the _Exigo Vegrandis Letum_ potion."

Her father had gotten her _pregnant? _Everything dropped into place: not eating at mealtimes, the ragged appearance, and the unwillingness to let go of the pain. She hadn't begun to heal because this was the point that had broken the last straw. The professor's sharp intake of breath was all that could be heard throughout the rooms. "Miss Granger, are you aware that this particular potion would've either been a most assuredly painful way to die or siphon your magic before you fully recorded the consequences."

"I did my research. If I was meant to survive, then I would've." she stated, but he knew there was something she wasn't saying. It didn't take a genius to place the pieces together.

"However, I suspect you were not planning on it." he said.

"Not planning on what?" Hermione stated reverting to monotone

"Surviving, Miss. Granger. You were simply not planning on surviving."

She raised her chin, but uttered no words of defiance. Snape walked across his foyer, and gently touched the spines of his books as he spoke again. "People look up to you Miss Granger, whether it be a student or a teacher. If everyone that does indeed hold you in that esteemed honor decided to follow in your footsteps… To give up when something gets hard, where would the world be? Mr. Potter would surely be dead, along with Mr. Weasley. Muggle born students would be gone. Longbottom, gone. Hmm... Maybe I should've let you go ahead. Let me out of my job." He pretended to sustain a disinterested flip through a book here and there, but he was waiting for a response from the stoic student. He continued when he realized that she was still in control. "You are not the first or last person this will happen to. Yours was not the worst. I have no idea why you keep acting like you are in an alternate reality where you're alone. It's not as if anyone forced you to..."

Finally anger blazed in her eyes as she registered the full weight of his words. "You do not understand. You will never understand, no one will. Why? Why should I give a damn? Someone should've noticed. SOMEONE! I left clues! I prayed to anyone who'd listen. I prayed for even you, you of all people, to come and save me. No one, no one came to rescue me. Dumbledore forced me to go home this summer, said I'd be happier and safer there. He refused my stay here with that damnable twinkle in his eyes. Maybe this world would be better without as many blind sighted people in it. Who am I to trust, please tell me, when the only constant in my life is myself, and I'm set on ignoring that at the moment. Everyone else turned a blind eye to me, so why should I care about anything including myself?"

When it was noted he didn't plan on rebutting, she added: "The most uncaring person on this earth thinks me self- serving, that's rich!"

"Miss Granger, I'm aware what you've been through..." he said in a gentler, if a little awkward, tone.

"No! No, no, no. DO NOT pity me." When she looked up, she saw his expression and the bulbous tears spilled down her cheeks. She rushed over to the surly man and piteously beating his frock coat with her clenched fist, before her resolve wavered and she crumbled against him with a gut wrenching sob. "No, no, no." she repeated voice thick with tears.

"You need to eat." he stated. If only to give her a reason to pull back. This only served for her to dig further into the stiff material, and murmur something incoherent.

He took a step back only to have her step with him. "Miss Granger..." when she did pull back and looked up at the foreboding man, the broken look she gave was enough to even break him. "Come... Let us eat." he paused, unsure which words would cause the girl to run. He repeated like a mantra in his head _I'm just following orders._ He knew, however, that this situation resembled... he refused to think of what exactly it mirrored. He had been wrong earlier, she wasn't his mother, she resembled someone to the't' and his jaw ached at seeing the defeated look on the girls face.

He led her through a hidden door in the sitting room, to his private kitchen. No one had ever been allowed to enter that particular branch of his quarters before, but he wasn't cold enough, had no need to be cold enough now, to tell her to wait for him. He also was not feeling confident enough to leave her in a room, alone, with so many poisonous ingredients, after the girls' earlier loathing of life.

He gestured for her to take the only seat in his kitchen, at his small dining table, and made her a bowl of krupnik soup. Having already prepared the separate parts of the soup the night before, it had only taken ten minutes. He set the bowl in front of her and commanded her to eat. Then stood in front of her, arms crossed, while she slowly drained the bowl. Lips pursed, he brought the pot over and ladled the rest of the soup in her bowl, then watched her flare in defiance before she resigned herself eat. When she was finished, he took the bowl and washed it. He normally sent the dishes to be washed, but he was pulling all the stops out in delaying while he figured out what exactly should come next. She was now staring at the picture he had painted almost twenty years ago of his aunt and uncle embracing. The truth was, he really regretted bringing her into his sanctuary and wanted her out, but how to do it?

Then something clicked. "Miss Granger, I do believe it is time to alert the headmaster."


	3. III

**My beta has vanished. So this is riddled with mistakes, just a warning. Anyone willing to beta, drop me a pm. Please review, good or bad.**

**Once again: not mine never will be.**

Severus had enough presence of mind to wrap Hermione in a cloak before taking her to the headmasters office. Unfortunately the headmaster wasn't there, so he handed Hermione the dose of sleeping draught he'd brought from his quarters, and before he could stop her, she downed the potion. It wasn't twenty seconds before she fell asleep and he caught her before she collapsed onto the cold stone floor. She had been too subservient, almost like a dog that's used to being kicked. Being this pliant, this soft spoken, was so unlike the girl that he was now half carrying, half dragging towards Minerva's quarters. He was unaware of the restrictions dealing with pregnancy in everything other than potions, so he felt it better to do things the Muggle way.

When he arrived at his colleagues quarters he cradled the sleeping Gryffindor to his chest and knocked. The transfiguration professor answered the door, a robe tossed over her night dress, and nothing hiding her sleep tousled hair. Severus forced her to step back as he walked into her rooms and deposited the sleeping student on the professors crimson sofa. He walked over to Minerva and slipped them both into the hall.

"Severus, this is most improper…" Minerva started, obviously flustered.

"Minerva, did I assume so incorrectly that you would rather not lose one of your students?" Severus said, cutting her off with a growl.

"You mean to say that she'd try to…" Minerva seemed lost now.

"I'm saying she already did. I'm going to find Albus and make him aware she needs constant supervision. I've concluded you'd rather have this cub under your watchful eyes." he said.

"Severus never once have you broken the faith I have in you. Forgive me if this is a little hard to swallow, but I'll watch her. More so than I have been." Minerva promised.

Severus nodded curtly, turned on his heel, and walked through the school until he reached his quarters.

When he got through his wards he noticed the green flash that signified floo travel was just ending, and a figure was now dusting itself off in front of his hearth.

"Severus, I do feel as if we have much to discuss." Albus Dumbledore said.

"I believe your right Albus." Severus said as he fell into the couch as the headmaster sat graciously in another chair. The room wasn't warm, or friendly, with it's dark greens and blacks to begin with, but the headmasters' projecting sense of foreboding left it with little happiness. "I trust you're aware of what happened tonight then?" Severus started, then gaped as the headmaster looked at him quizzically.

"No, I'm not aware. I was out of the castle tonight with Argus." The headmaster was now looking anywhere but at him.

"If you did not know, then what did you come to my rooms to discuss?"

"A letter, Severus. A disturbing letter sent from a father to his daughter, which hints at attempts to impregnate the girl. To aid his quest in keeping her at home, in his clutches, for as long as possible."

Albus noted looking conflicted on the edge of nausea and rage. He finally looked at Severus and his decision was clear through his obviously hate filled eyes. "I thought you'd like to read it."

"No, Albus. Just tell me, he was truly trying to get her pregnant?" he said little more than a whisper.

"Yes. I questioned him with a truth spell. He had even been taking fertility treatments. Apparently Muggles poke holes in themselves and ingest chemicals to have babies. Barbaric really. I'm just glad they didn't work…" Albus continued to ramble.

"They did work." Severus managed to croak out.

"What was that?" Albus turned his head to the potions master.

"They did work! The stupid girl tried to use a potion to rid her body of the parasite. Coincidentally she chose a potion that would also allow death to settle in and ingested it a short while ago. She's pregnant Albus. Bloody pregnant!" His emotions got the better of him, and ebony tendrils whipped against his face. He stood sharply and threw a glass goblet into the fire, which lit itself when the glass approached. A sharp shattering noise set him off and onto a rampage he was. Anything that could be shattered was until there was no glass, or porcelain, left in his sitting room.

"Severus." Albus said calmly. The man in question melted into the couch.

"Albus, what are you going to do? According to the laws the school board has written she can't stay here. I'm guessing if you questioned Mr. Granger then he is out of our custody, and he had guardianship of her. It will take at least a week to change that in the Muggle systems. I doubt your going to send her home."

"I believe you forgot the one addendum to the school boards precocious law. I believe law 429 addendum 1 states; A witch who is pregnant cannot have a long term residency at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, unless the aforementioned pregnant witch is bound into a marriage. Long term residency is categorized as more than six months. I will broach the subject to Miss Granger after breakfast tomorrow and see if she has any suggestions. No matter what you think, it is a horrendous, but fortunate event that Miss. Granger did in fact conceive," as Severus whirled at the other wizard, Albus put his hand up. "because of two things. The first reason is that Minstry law states that Muggles may only be prosecuted by magical means if there is a personal tie with them to someone of magical means. That means that Mr. Granger is now a contender for Azkaban. Then, Ms. Granger can't be indifferent about this. This is a decision that she has to make for herself. I'm glad you stopped her today, Severus. I do not believe that she could live with herself if she were to kill the child. Although, I could be wrong. I will not insult you in asking if she is alright, I know that since you are here you felt it safe enough to leave her."

"Albus, it isn't safe to leave her. I brought her to Minerva's quarters so she may have a proper chaperone. And what if there is something wrong with the child?"

"Severus, you know as well as I do that every person whom has magic running through their veins has less than a one percent chance of having any sort of birth defect aside from being born magic-less. She's not susceptible to the problems from inbreeding that we have researched with the pure bloods either. Mr. Granger is by all means her step-father." he said.

"What do you mean?" Severus turned towards the dotty old man.

"Miss Granger was never aware, Mrs. Granger probably never figured it out, but Mr. Granger is not Hermione's father. It seems that the Muggle plot of many romance novels is at work here. A couple fights, they separate, both bring other people to their bed, then realize they've made a mistake and go back to their partners. The elder Grangers always believed that Hermione was conceived on the night they decided to stay together. Unfortunately Mrs. Granger realized a little too late that she'd made the mistake of infidelity." he stated calmly. "Have you made any progress in talking to the girl?"

"She is broken Albus. I cannot fix that which is irreparable."

"If I believed she was beyond repair then I wouldn't have given you the task, my boy. It will take time."

"If she had show any sign of wanting to live, I would say you are right. She has not. She has not shown one sign of life since we have taken her out of there. She is like a ghost, Albus. A ghost who creeps around everyone and everything afraid to leave her mark."

"That is the point. With this she cannot. She has to choose what she can live with. Only select people know, will know, what her father has done to her. And I will keep it that way. You were her rescuer, and as such may have a key the rest of us do not in which to open her up."

The headmaster got out of the chair and headed to the hearth.

"Once again, Albus, you've appointed me to pick up the pieces." A remark, dripping with disdain.

"What was that?" the headmaster turned towards the professor.

"I meant, Albus, that I am once again fixing everything, with a healing charm and a spell, that you've broken in the first place. This is your fault." the last was said deadpan.

"If you think that I do not know that, then you truly do not know me at all, Severus. I sent that girl to a fate worse Chelsea's, and I did it with a wave of my hand and a smile. I've made the same mistake twice, I know what I've done." with that Albus swirled into the hearth and disappeared into the roaring green flames.

Severus couldn't tell when he went to sleep that night, however, he knew it was after the dusky sky had blossomed, his dreams and thoughts filled of Chelsea.

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"Minerva." Severus said, the woman turned toward him in the cold hall. "I have a need of Miss Grangers assistance today. I am to go to the apothecary garden." It was enough said in front of the invisible listening ears of Potter.

"Of course, Severus. I imagine she should be eating by now in the Great Hall." Minerva too sensed the presence of the-boy-who-managed-to-skulk-about.

Snapes nod was the only acknowledgment before he turned and walked through the castle and into the giant double doors. He silently gave Potter a couple of mental brownie points for finding a shortcut through the school when he saw Potter enter the dining area before he himself could. He gave himself a moment to allow him the element of surprise back on his side again, then stalked in. He only had to pass about a half of the Gryffindor table before being put directly behind the girl.

"Miss Granger." He drawled.

She looked up at him with an emotional mask on her face. A glance at Potters white knuckles told him that Potter knew too, but Weasley was most definitely oblivious as he bit into another pancake.

"When you are finished masticating the rest of your meal, I believe you have detention with me."

He didn't listen for a response before he walked to the head table. From there he saw when Miss Granger left the table. After that he finished his meal of eggs quickly, he left the hall and upon arriving at the door to his classroom he saw Hermione already inside. She was slowly walking examining the various bottles of ingredients.

"Planning on stealing again? It didn't work too well last time." He drug the deepest sound he could make from his lung, and was satisfied when she jumped back.

"Sir, I…" He cut her off with a wave of his hand.

"Has the headmaster spoken with you?"

She nodded her head, as he opened his mouth to reply the headmaster stepped out of the roaring green flames in the hearth.

"Ah, Severus, I need to speak with you Miss Granger I trust you can keep yourself busy." At her nod he all but drug the potions master to the fireplace.


	4. IV

**My beta has vanished. So this is riddled with mistakes, just a warning. Anyone willing to beta, drop me a pm. Please review, good or bad.**

**Once again: not mine never will be.**

The headmaster lead Severus into his office, sat down wearily, and waived his hand at the chair across from his.

"I take it the board didn't like Mr. Weasley?"

"They like him just fine as a person, Severus. It's as a father that they're having trouble with him. The board has decided that both Miss Granger and Mr. Weasley must prove themselves as eligible parents before they can marry. However the board has agreed that while Hermione is proving herself she is able to stay at the school."

"How does the board want them to prove themselves, Albus?" Severus said, putting his head in his hands.

"A parenting course." Dumbledore emphasized. "One of Hogwarts staff needs to be told the horrible tale so they can prepare for the difficulties that this young women will purpose."

"Yes, singling her out more. I can see exactly how that will placate a traumatized girl."

"I know, Severus. I just can't see anyway around it."

"What do you suggest we do?" Severus said.

"The board has been on the curriculum for a while. They wanted to introduce a sexual education class. We can start a base for the program this year, volunteer sixth and seventh years only… with the potion you'd developed when Chelsea had her problem."

The potion Master looked at him aghast. "You want to _make _students pregnant?"

Albus looked at him. "And you know just as well as I do that it would be completely false pregnancies and there would be no lasting trauma from them."

"Albus, who did they vote in as the teacher?" Severus suddenly asked.

"Severus we can go through this numerous times and we both know you will cave. You know as well as I do you have more free time then the other teachers. You also have a select group of sixth and seventh years at your disposal. You are the teacher they voted in. And before you ask, you can gain pleasure by taking the histories of the women and deciding which to give whom."

"Ah, you know me well."

"Yes, I know of your hate for some of the students you had to favor, but I also know you're going to give Hermione's to Ginerva Weasley, and you'll have to be nice to her to get the information we need."

"Albus." He said in a warning growl.

"Unless you want to take it yourself?" The Headmaster looked at him with a curious expression, then chuckled when he saw the younger mans horrified one. "I though not."

"Fine. I'll speak to her." As Severus got up the headmaster waived him back.

"I'm instituting Hermione as a student teacher for that class, and adding a wing of apartments to the castle. They're going to need to be separated from the rest of the student population for the school year, especially when the babies are 'delivered'."

"How do you suppose we give them a chance to show they can handle children?"

"It's a magical adaptation of a muggle concept. Child development classes in muggle high schools include an infant simulator. Take two drops of blood from the mothers, one for the potion, and one to create the infants. The board has already come up with one. It will make the transition easier for some."

"And how does Miss Granger feel about not being able to marry Mr. Weasley?"

"Considering she wasn't favorable towards the idea before? She'll probably be ecstatic. I will have to warn her however, she has to marry before the last day of school, or this years grades will be null and void."

"How are we supposed to know if Mr. Weasley is a capable parent before the grades are in?"

"They suggest having the students pair, and having them switch on and off with the baby for three out of four semesters. There will be an even number of students. They will get their grades directly sent to the ministry. The ministry approved this given exception that we not even see the grades. The record of the child will be sent as it happens to the ministry. But, obviously this is only necessary if she chooses to keep the child."

Another horrific idea planted itself in Severus' head. "Where will Ms. Granger be staying, if she so chooses?"

"Well Severus, she will be treated like any other apprentice. She will be staying with you."

"And how does she feel about that?" He asked with a grin.

"She took that as the only good news in the whole ordeal. I've summoned her. Do close your mouth." Dumbledore looked around the room, then again at his flabbergasted potions master. "There are no flies."

There was a quiet knock on the door, and then the squeaking of the hinges. The girl came in. For the first time that day he realized what she was wearing.

A white sweater with a thick burgundy ribbon at the collar and hem which was… obscenely muggle, over a pair of tight jeans. He realized she was almost as pale as he was. The golden hue that once caressed her skin had fled, and left her pasty. The amber highlights in her hair blended in the darker brown tresses. All of this made her golden eyes stand out even more.

"I'm sorry Hermione, they haven't agreed to Mr. Weasley's proposal, but they've agreed to you staying for this year, pending you get married before graduation day."

"Well, I guess that's good.""Have you decided…" The headmaster let himself trail off.

"Yes, I've decided I'm going to keep it." She said looking down.

"Then you have my condolences, and congratulations. We're going to have to inform the teachers of your condition, and if given your permission how it happened, to avoid any attempts at usurping your position."

"I'd rather just as soon forget, I imagine it'd be better to tell them now than wait." She said with steel in her voice.

"Then that's settled. Now, Hermione, I do have a favor to ask you. I'm expecting the new Defense teacher at any moment. She's bringing her brother, and I wanted someone to take him on a tour of the school. Do you think your up to it?" Dumbledore asked.

"Sure. Where should I meet him?"

"He'll be arriving at the entrance doors." At a chiming noise he added. "They've arrived, Hermione, if you don't mind." He waved towards the door, and without a word she left the office.

"Severus, I need you to meet the Defense teacher at the lake. Bring her to the great hall when your through. I have a feeling it'll be time for the feast before your back."

Severus knew he didn't have a choice in the matter, so he got out of his chair, and made his way to the lake. It had started pouring while he had been inside so he cast a water repelling charm on himself.

On the dock in the middle of the storm was a woman. She had long black hair in soft curls that complimented her pale skin. Wearing a black cowl neck sweater and blue jeans you could see she was heavy, but with wind blowing her hair back and eyes that matched the clouds she looked more like a goddess than a teacher. When the rain came down harder, she still stood on the dock with a small smirk, looking into the turmoil that was the lake during a harsh storm. Giving the cresting waves and sleeting rain a look as if it were a long-time lover.

He knew that face. He was figuring out where he had seen it before when she spoke.

"Hey, I'm…" The magic that flowed from the woman intensified and definitely felt like a swift kick in the gut. He leveled his wand with the hollow point of her throat. She did something unexpected, she hissed at him, and his wand never wavered.

"Ah, the one I most wanted to see." She purred dangerously.

"Why?" Snape said.

"Who am I?" She asked, still in that purring contralto.

"An elemental." he pushed through clenched teeth.

"Who, not what." When he paused she added, "Let me give you a hint, '_Toby_'" She drawled. "_Why does it rain when I cry_?" She mimicked a child's' voice.

"Amethyst." He whispered.

"In the flesh. Lower your wand." Her eyes flashed dangerously.

"How?" He grit out, wand still unwavering.

"You want to know the why, not the how. Now back down, or I'll make you back down."

"Why, then? Why've you come?" He asked.

"I've come to perform the blood rights."

"What do you want from me?" She heard him plead.

"I won't force you into anything but telling me about my sister."

"Why?"

"Well there's really three possible questions there. The first one being; Why wouldn't I force you into something more in depth, given that I can make you do anything? The answer to that would be, simply, because I've had too many things forced on me to care for that power. Second, why do I want to know about my sister? Well, because she tried to force me to know her, at fourteen I didn't really care. Finally, third, would definitely be, why you? Well, I thought that'd be obvious to both of us. You have one more chance, lower your wand." Her voice commanded obedience, but he wasn't fast enough. Soon, the potions master was on his knees, gasping for air. It was almost painful to watch him try to cast a spell.

"Magic can't travel in a space devoid of air. Funny, isn't it. I am the most powerful witch alive, and I've had to hide for years. Can you imagine what _he _would have done if I was at his disposal?" She grasped his wand, pocketed it, and ended the spell. You could see him visibly take a deep breath. "Oh, don't be such a wuss, I left you with enough in your lungs to sustain you."

_That should have been followed with her sticking out her tongue, _he thought.

"Fine." She said, then she stuck out her tongue, like a petulant five year old.

"How?"

"I've fine tuned everything since I was fourteen, _Toby._" She seemed to be listening to the wind. "The headmaster wants to know if we're done yet. We need to get back. I feel the need to warn you. As I know it will be painful for you. My _brother, _his names Toby. He's Chelsea's, she named him after you. Worse is that he looks like her." She stood, not ready for the anguish that flooded out of him. After a while he turned it off like a faucet, and visibly steeled himself. "Come on," she said, "He's really getting anxious."

As they made their way around the lake she looked at him, confused, and asked, "What's a Hagrid?"


	5. V

**A/N: Thanks again to my beta for putting up with my time delays and overall grammar, or lack thereof. **

When they walked up Amethyst had a secretive smile, and just as Severus was about to ask they had arrived at the gates only to meet up with a smiling Hermione and his own personal hell. "Toby." Severus drawled. "Your sister has told me so much about you."

"Hi, you must be professor Snare, Snave, Snake. There it is, Professor Snake. Hello." Toby put his hand out as a greeting. Snape looked past the boy to the two girls, they were both attempting to school their faces. It wasn't working for either of them.

"Professor Snape, Toby. Snape." Hermione finally managed to bubble out. _Well at least she's laughing today, _he thought.

"That's right. Sorry, I'm horrible with names." Snape finally shook his hand.

Toby waved towards Hermione. "This is Hermione." He said to his 'sister'.

Amethyst reached out her hand. "Hi, I'm Amethyst Sertlin. The new DADA teacher. I understand your Sev's apprentice?"

Both Hermione and Severus looked at her like she'd grown another head. "Sev?" They said in unison.

"Well I can hardly call you what I normally do in public, can I? I'll never forget it. And your asking for it in that outfit." She asked looking poignantly at the person now dubbed 'Sev'.

He visibly grit his teeth and Hermione finally let out a winded laugh.

"Then, yes, I'm apprenticing with Sev. Hermione shook her hand. "Oh, 'Sev', the Headmaster wanted to see you, something about a dance he wants to have tomorrow. Professor McGonagal is already transfiguring outfits."

"Lovely, and where can I find the old miscreant?" Severus held the bridge of his nose.

"He said to meet him in the great hall, and also said to bring Toby with you to the meeting."

"Well, come along then." Severus drug the young boy with him.

"Lets take a walk," the new professor said suddenly.

"Okay." Hermione said unsure.

They walked in silence until they got to the gardens, then abruptly Amethyst sat down, Hermione followed suit.

"You can stop pretending your happy now, the only other one here is me and I already know."

"News sure does travel fast." She said sarcastically. She let her face slip into her familiar blankness.

"You'd be surprised by what I know."

"Really?" She asked venomously.

"Yes, like I know you told your mother once." Amethyst looked at the younger girl.

"How?" Hermione couldn't hide the shocked expression.

"Do you know that when your taught to listen you can hear things on the wind. Next time you ask for help be a little more specific about your location."

"That's only possible for… You're an elemental."

"Yes. I want you to do something for me, I want you to tell me everything that happened. Your going to end up hating yourself and hating the baby, most of all, if you don't."

"I can't."

"You can. Break it down to it's skeleton form, add in your feelings. Make it your story." At Hermione's expression, she added, "If your do this, I will tell you about what happened to me. Actually I will do one better, I'll show you if you need it. How did it start?"

Hermione sighed. As an elemental, the new professor would already know. She had fought since this had been found out to not have to tell anyone what had happened, as if it coming from her own mouth would somehow make it more real. There would be nothing for Professor Sertlin to gain by listening to her story, and maybe it would actually help. She took a breath and tried to figure where to start.

"He started when I was twelve, got me drunk. It started with my hands. I didn't think there was anything wrong because I had given massages before, it seemed the same. Then he wanted me to use my mouth, I hated it, but I hated other things more, he let me skip if I did it. After that, I was thirteen, he took my virginity. That's when I realized things were wrong. It was horrible. I was home for the summer and he became unemployed for a while. We were home alone a lot and it was easier for him to have at me then. I told my mother and she thought I was lying. She loved him. He got a job and I had learned to deal with the summers. This past year I asked Dumbledore to let me stay at the castle, but he said I had to go home. This summer I realized I was raised to be the perfect prostitute. They make the price, and I agree, however steep it is on my end, because I feel stuck. I'm the one to blame. It'd stopped for a while and I just got tired of arguing when he asked me to start again." Hermione paused.

Amethyst looked up, but Hermione wouldn't look at her.

"He asked me if I could periodically come home this school year and I brought the rulebook out. Just to show him that it was against school policy. Apparently he read the whole bloody thing, and discovered I'm not allowed to be here if I'm pregnant. He started taking medication. I asked him what kind, he told me pain medication. He used condoms most of the time, but I found a set of pins that hadn't been in the pantry before. I knew I was pregnant about a week before they found me, and I knew what he'd done. I'm about nine weeks now. He kept track of my periods, I found a journal that he'd kept." She couldn't avoid it anymore, she sighed and tears trailed down her face.

"What have you decided to do with the baby?" Amethyst asked.

Hermione mumbled.

"No you need to say this out loud. This is _the_ most important part. You didn't have a choice before. **You are not to blame. **This isn't a punishment. If you do not think you can cope with a child get an abortion, give it up for adoption. But you need to decide this. Without thinking it's a consequence. What are you going to do with the baby?"

Hermione looked at her. "I'm going to raise it."

"Why?"

Hermione had not been ready for that question and she struggled with the right words. "Regardless of whose fault this actually is, it's not the baby's. I know what I would do to the baby, but how would I give it up, possibly to the same situation I was in?"

"You're right, and you will learn to trust people, it'll take a lot of time, and a lot of conscious effort on your part. But now I think that we need to eat, seeing as you haven't eaten properly in a long time. Your sitting with me at the head table so I can watch you. You just told me you wanted the baby. You need to take care of yourself and the baby right now. Understand?"

Hermione had a sad smile when she looked up. "I understand."  
They got up and walked to the doors of the castle. Quickly Amethyst swung around and faced the younger girl. "Two things. I want you to trust Severus. He's going to want to be close to you, be nosey." She thought about that a second. "No pun intended, I swear. Second. I will come get you right after I get into my quarters, I want to show you something."

"Alright." Hermione replied.

Hermione looked at the rest of the food piled onto her plate. There was still chicken, turkey, crisps, and remnants of fruit. She had already eaten almost two platefuls, and her pants were constricting her abdomen. She pushed the plate away with a sigh. This was the first time she'd been full in almost two months, and she felt lethargic, albeit a good feeling. Nausea was lurking in the back corner of her subconscious, but she figured she'd enjoy it while it wasn't overwhelming.

Professor Amethyst Sertlin was sneaking glances at her while having a conversation with the one and only head of Gryffindor. They were talking about the theme for the dance, which would now be Muggle myths. To demote house rivalries, names had been drawn out of the sorting hat. The sorting hat must've had a sense of humor because Hermione had put her hand in and drawn out the name Severus Snape. Out of everyone, student and teacher, she wasn't sure why the hat had picked him. The new professor was going through the teachers and comparing them to gods and goddess' to help figure out costumes. The big reveal, including who your partner was and who you were dressed as, would be tomorrow night. Since you were supposed to keep your partner a secret, bunches of students were herding to the owlery.

Hermione headed with the rest of the Gryffindors, and tried to make a decision. Who they should dress as, what he would be willing to put on? So many questions, and none of them she could ask. She could imagine if she sent him what the other students were sending their dates: Hey, uh.. Haven't seen you since second year. You know anything about myths? I was thinking that we'd go dressed as big fricken rainbows. Oh yeah, you only wear black. Right. Erm… I'll cover myself in soot from the floo, and we can go as the god and goddess of ash.

She was hysterical by the time she got to her chambers. She took a step inside and made sure she had the right door. All of her things were gone. She could feel the frown on her face as she saw the note that hadn't been there when she left this morning.

Dear Miss Granger,

Special circumstances involving the new class have demanded the headmaster place a new tower in the castle. I would like to congratulate you on becoming the head girl of the Unity House. The house is located to the right of the Potions classroom. A portrait has been added for convenience. I will meet you in the great hall to lead you to your new rooms.

Prof. Amethyst G. Sertlin.

Defense Against Dark Arts

Hogwarts

Hermione felt like she lost everything. Even the sanctity of her familiar rooms somehow eluded her. She bit her lip and briskly turned on her heel, almost colliding with her bespectacled best friend. She had avoided him since they had returned from her house, except for times when he would be unable to ask her what had happened.

"I'm sorry Harry, I have to go see the new DADA teacher. Can I catch up with you later?"

He ran his hand through his ever tousled hair. "When did we start to keep secrets from one another?"

She gave a sad smile, "When you were happy and I just wasn't."

"You know, eventually you'll have to talk to me." He said with a piercing gaze.

"I know," She said as she went past him. "And I dread that day."

It made her heart ache when she had to lie keep things from her best friends, but in her head it still had to be done. She leaned against the door to the great hall and sighed. This was **her **life, these were **her friends.** Maybe she should just tell them, the thought was cut off as she heard hushed voices close to the other side of the door.

"I think I've found a solution to the glamour problem." It was the headmaster.

"What've you found? I couldn't find anything that he wouldn't suspect." The American Professor's husky tones. They moved further from the door and as Hermione was about to enter another door burst open.

"I knew it!" This time it was Snape. "You're making yourself look like her to punish me! Take it off now."

"No-" She was cut off.

"Now." He sounded feral.

"Severus, I implore you." The headmaster almost sounded pleading.

"No. Let me know what my personal hell looks like."

"Once I take it off I will not go through putting it all on again." Her voice made it sound like a threat. "Your word that you understand."

"You have my word." His voice sounded clipped.

Soon enough Hermione heard a thud and her Gryffindor curiosity won over, she had to know what was going on.

She slowly entered the hall.

In front of her was a sight straight from a painting. Severus Snape on his knees, in front of a beautiful witch. She looked to be about twenty, the laugh lines, and small wrinkles nowhere to be seen. It was the same Amethyst Sertlin she had met and talked with earlier, but the cheekbones were different. Minute changes to the mouth, nose, eyes. Her hair was a little longer, wavier, and had auburn thrown in. She stood differently, and she must've lost a hundred pounds.

Dumbledore looked at the two with sadness, until he saw Hermione.

"Ah, Miss Sertlin, I believe we can finish this later, it seems Miss Granger has arrived."

The woman turned toward the student and gave a miniscule smile. "I expect to finish this later." She said as she turned towards the man still on his knees. "Remember, I warned you." She moved gracefully, like she had more muscles than anything human, grabbed a statuesque Hermione by the wrist and gently led her out of the hall.

"Come along." She said as she slunk down a set of stairs and stood in front of a portrait of the four house crests. She let go of Hermione's hand and placed her own on the painting between the crests. The painting illuminated itself and swung open. They both stepped through into a sitting room. The furniture was off-white, on beige carpet with stone walls. However, everything was somehow strewn with color. Pillows, draperies, and knick knacks were shades of red, blue, green, and yellow. There were four doors formed in a semicircle at the back of the room. The one closest to Hermione said 'Head Girl', so she turned the knob. When she entered her room she smiled. Everything was done in cobalt, twilight blue, or black. Blue had always been her favorite color. There was a bassinette next to a very large four poster bed. There were also four doors off of the side wall. She read the name plates on each of them out loud. "Bathroom, girls dorm, nursery, and … Professor Snapes quarters? Why do I have a door to Professor Snape's bedroom."

"As his apprentice you will need unrestricted access to his quarters and the lab which will also be through there." She pointed to the door.

"Oh." Hermione said putting her head down.

Amethyst sat on one of the couches and beckoned to Hermione. "Come here." When Hermione sat down she continued. "I'm going to show you what happened to me before I got away. Then you can ask me questions. I won't show you the worst of what happened, but you'll get the idea."

Hermione nodded.

Amethyst reached out and clasped hands with her. Soon Hermione felt like she was falling, but the feeling stopped as quickly as it had started. Hermione looked around at her new surroundings. The walls were a pale blue, and the linens on the sleigh bed were a crisp white. There were book cases from floor to ceiling covering two of the walls. A picture of a girl that looked remarkably similar to the professor hung on the far wall. The girl was surprisingly a still portrait. There in the room was Amethyst standing next to the bed looking in disgust at the fixtures around her.

A man looking to be about forty came in. He had deep auburn hair, about shoulder length, most of which was tied back to reveal the severe angles of his face. As Hermione was watching he asked her to get on top. Just asked her saying that she owed it to him. Like a payment. It was so reminiscent of her previous situation that she started shaking violently. She turned and was standing there refusing to watch the lifeless women move above the grunting man. It was over soon, but Hermione knew from experience that every second felt like an hour. As the man got up and moved the professor rushed to put on her underwear and pants. The memory started to go hazy as Amethyst looked up at the painting. As she was yanked back to her own body she heard yelling.

"Get the fuck out of my head!"

"Why would you…" Again her potions master and the DADA professor were trying to claw at eachothers' jugulars although, this fight seemed more violent.

"What the fuck did you think I was doing, showing her Chelsea? No, I went through things that would have given you nightmares Severus Snape. You left me there. You left me there, and you killed my sister. One I can forgive, but not both. I've been telling myself that she was right, that anyone would've behaved that way without thinking first. I don't think so. How rich that you think of that. 'I can't leave her there.' You seriously think that's what caused her to perish?" She didn't wait for any sign of acknowledgement before Hermione felt herself being sucked back into a memory.

She heard a feminine voice whispering and saw two almost identical girls on a bed.

"Why are you doing this?" She heard Amethyst say. She was younger but it most definitely was her.

"I'm doing this because I'm pregnant with his child. When it's not just yourself that your worried about, you make silly decisions. We'll be back, don't worry, and we will get you out of here." It was the girl from the portrait.

The memory changed and it was different, it was the other girls memory. She saw a much younger Snape with the girl. He caressed her face, and whispered to her softly. You could see the love on his face, but she pulled back with tears in her eyes.

"I slept with someone else." It came out hurried and she looked as though she had a bad taste in her mouth.

He looked as if his heart was going to break, she tried to speak "Severus, please. Don't it wasn't…"

Snape's face slipped into the only emotion Hermione had seen besides anger, disdain. "And you came crawling back. You. Disgust. Me. I expect never to see you again. Leave!" The cruelty in those words made Hermione flinch.

"You don't understand. It…"

"What, it didn't mean anything? Chelsea! What are you going to say that'll make any difference. I can't think of anything that would harp on my conscience enough that you won't be thrown out into the rain."

"Severus." She pleaded.

"It doesn't matter. **You** never mattered!" He screamed.

She looked at him, and she had that same air of resignation that ran through Hermione's blood. "Goodbye, Severus."

The memory ended as quickly as it had begin. In the real world Hermione could feel her hair whipping her face, and her clothes plastering to her body, but she was still in a memory.

Chelsea was crying on her bed, and Amethyst came in. She ran her hands through Chelsea's hair, and sat next to her. Chelsea sat up then froze. She murmured, "I still love him. You need to make him understand." Tears welled up in Amethysts eyes as she shook her head, "You'll be here." she said.

"No, I won't. Name him Toby."

Before Hermione even knew what was going on Chelsea had bound Amethyst, levitated her to the corner, and covered her with an invisibility cloak.

Hermione saw the man from earlier storm through the door. He flew at Chelsea. Grabbing her by the shoulders, you could hear the pop of the joint going out of socket. Hermiones' brain had shut down. She could see the damage that was being done to the girl, but nothing registered. Just before reality resurfaced Hermione saw Chelsea go down. Head cracking against the floor and the spell that was holding Amethyst in place disappeared. Hermione was brought back into reality with what felt like a slap. She was crying, again. Hermione looked at the professors. Snape's face stayed in those familiar lines, but his eyes held the bitter air of untold agony. It took him a moment, but he made a swift motion with his right hand then his wand was drawn. He had pointed it at Professor Sertlin, and then waited poised like a snake.

"Well we can talk about her for a moment. You wouldn't listen to my sister as she was apologizing for my father raping her. She was pregnant with your child! I damn near drained my magic, fighting just to keep her alive long enough to safely deliver Toby. I got hell for that too. That's when he started everything. Started raping me and said it was to ensure my participation later. I either got beaten or raped every fucking day, and you didn't even look for me! He almost touched **your** son. I killed him for that. I killed him because you were to much of an ass to even think! YOU never mattered."

"I'm sorry." The potions professor sounded choked, but his face was still in that familiar mask.

"Would you like to see what he did to me?" she didn't wait for a reply. They were sucked back into a memory.

In the middle of the room from the first memory was Amethyst, naked, hung by her wrists, which were tied together just above her head. Blood ran down her chin, to fall between her breasts, from a cut in her lip that was still bleeding profusely. An array of multi-colored bruises decorated her body, along with shallow half healed slices that seemed to accentuate how frail a human body is. The chains that bound her were on a sort of a dog run, and Hermione realized that that meant this wasn't an infrequent thing. If someone had given this that much thought it occurred on a regular basis. She was mesmerized by the girls tears. Hermione had never seen anyone cry as if there heart had shattered before.

That same horrible man came in right behind Hermione and as he walked through her Hermione recognized the resigned air now emanating from the hung woman. She watched in horror as he started touching her. She could hear him berating her for body telling the lie that she was enjoying the attention. "You can't rape the willing." He kept saying. Soon he lifted his arm and pushed on the woman's wrists like a hanger, onto the bed. The man muttered a spell to lengthen the chains and when she laid down she had the same look Hermione had felt herself have over the years. The man got undressed and harshly parted the woman's thighs. He sat up and brought his hand back, punching the woman in the face with such might that her head snapped back. She heard him grumble, "To make you move." Great heaving sobs were heard as he entered her and then subsequently finished in her.

Hermione was unabashed by her own tears. Such hate welled in her that she was frightened by the ferocity of it. She raged as she watched the man untie Amethyst's hands, and as opposed to fighting him, she just cowered covering her nude body.

Again pulled back into reality Hermione was starting to become acutely aware of the fact she had filled herself. She looked around for the nearest trashcan.

Amethyst let out a guttural scream and suddenly Hermione felt suffocated in a room almost bursting with wind. Hair and clothes alike were plastered to her body, but still her lungs were shriveling. She stood there not able to take a full breath, watching her two professors. Soon the air seemed to become thick and cloying, as Amethysts eyes looked like lightning was contained in them. Hermione tried to slow her racing heart, tried to use less air, but to no avail, her vision started to become hazy around the edges. She fell to her knees and the movement caused the professors to look at her.

"No! You'll kill her!" The potions professor gritted out.

Amethyst seemed to realize what she was doing and visibly tried to reign it back in. A terrified look crossed her face, after a agonizing moment the air stabilized itself and Hermione gasped then started to cough. Her body working to get oxygen back into itself, but she never took her eyes off of Amethyst.

Amethyst looked at her, then back to Severus. Her voice was thick with tears when she spoke. "I can't hate you." She looked to Hermione. "I'm so sorry." Then she left.

About three minutes passed before someone broke the silence.

"Miss. Granger… Are you well?" He seemed at a loss as to what to say.

She wasn't. "You bloody git! I never believed that you would fall into every bloody category the student body puts you into. I can't believe you had the nerve."

"Miss Granger! Calm yourself!"

She visibly shrunk. "You know, professor, I was out of line. However, you need to find her."

"Why would I do that?" He glared at her.

"You have no idea, do you?" At his hesitation she continued voice still minutely raspy. "She summoned power, power that you can't stave off for long. As an elemental she can pull more power from the elements. In normal circumstance she would use it for what she called it for. She's now fighting with her magic against the elements that are primal bloodthirsty entities. She has one hell of a battle just because you attacked her." It felt saner to talk about things that she was knowledgeable about then to talk about what had just transpired.

"How will it affect her?" He seemed to think the same thing.

"Eventually it will stabilize, but she'll be weak. If she was in the castle we would still feel the struggle that means she's outside. That means that she's most likely in the forest, and is already, or will soon become, unconscious."

"I'll send Poppy." The professor pushed his hair back in a nervous gesture that shocked her.

She nodded then thought, "You can't. Professor Sertlin isn't registered. Poppy would have to inform the ministry."

"Then who would you have me send?" He was angry.

"I'll go." She steeled herself.

"I think not, have you forgotten your affliction?"

"Yes, because it's something that's easy to forget," she huffed, then paused, "then you get her."

"I don't-"

"Do you want her to become food for something in the forest." At his hesitation she continued. "It's your fault, now fix it. Go, now."

He visibly flinched, turned on his heel and left. She sat then, on the off-white sofa. The silence, as it always had, allowed her to think. Unfortunately her thoughts were filled with the violence and torture she'd just witnessed.


	6. VI

**A/N: Woot! A new chapter. Life happened, and then I really just wasn't in the right state of mind to write. Although the chapter after this is already on it's way to my fabulous beta, so hopefully you'll see that soon.**

As he carried the woman back from the forbidden forest he thanked the spiders. They had formed a protective circle around her while she fought the onslaught of power. A small spider led him directly to her with only a minimal amount of salivation. When he had picked her up she'd opened her eyes in defense only to close them again after saying his name. Now as she was completely unconscious, he assessed the damage. All the small scratches and her broken wrist would be easy enough to fix; however, Pepper Up potion wouldn't be strong enough for the exhaustion she'd feel in the morning.

He looked at her face. The angelic structure was his most redemptive heaven, and most condemning hell. So reminiscent of the face he thought to never gaze upon again. Her hair while dark was not naturally black; he could see the hair from the top of her scalp was the same rich color he remembered, mahogany brown with dark cherry highlights. He knew without chemical treatments her hair would hang heavily in soft waves.

He had always loved that about Chelsea, she'd learned to be herself with him. She hadn't bothered spelling her hair or make up. She had been beautiful, but unconventionally so. She'd had the same cat-like eyes as Amethyst, but Chelsea's were an interesting shade of aqua. While Amethyst's eyes used to have foretold wisdom, Chelsea's had the youthful naïveté. Now Amethyst's eyes were bitter, even when she smiled, he could tell it didn't reach her eyes. He followed the contour of her upper lip with his gaze. The exquisite torture of knowing exactly how to kiss the bow-shaped mouth, how he could part it with a well placed slip of the tongue. It truly pained him. It was the right face, the right body, but the wrong person.

He had loved Amethyst too, as a sister, as a daughter, as a friend, because of Chelsea.

He looked at the castle. He knew as soon as he walked into the unity house he'd be barraged, but not in the traditional sense. No, whereas Amethyst looked like Chelsea, Miss Hermione Granger acted like her. He remembered the perfectly manicured hand waiving in the great hall, Chelsea still was the only student ever to ask a question about being sorted. After Hermione sat in her first class he had downed three bottles of the finest Firewhiskey in Hogsmeade. He had learned to deal with the constant presence of Hermione, how he was going to deal with Amethyst remained to be seen.

Amethyst stirred in his arms and mumbled incoherently. He sighed and headed into the castle. Because the tower was next to the potions classroom, walking toward the new tower was still familiar enough that he had no need to pay attention, and his mind wandered. What was he to do about Hermione? He knew that the misguided headmaster had put her in his care, and he knew he was expected to fix her but, how? Finally he reached the entrance, and he extended his hand toward the painting and it swung open, revealing Granger in another negligee. This one was a deep vibrant purple. He hissed as she stepped closer and bent over the woman in his arms, her breasts almost spilling out of the nightdress.

"As thrilling as it is to have your femininity on display, Miss Granger, I would appreciate if you put on proper night attire." He said through clenched teeth.

"My father rid me of all my 'proper night attire' as you call it." She said monotone.

He truly did not know what to say to her so he averted his gaze and started walking through the portrait. Setting her down on the cream colored couch was not his smartest idea. Her hand fell to the cushion and left a small streak of blood. The house elves were godsend in this instance. They knew how to do the impossible, and getting blood out of a sofa was infinitely easier than getting it out of a stone.

Hermione looked at both of her professors, and then sighed. "_Something has rendered Snape speechless. I'll have to remember that."_ She trekked into her bedroom and rifled through her trunk, grabbing the small box that held all of her medicinal potions. Then summoned a washcloth and basin from the bathroom, and walked back into the common room, past the still stoic professor. She set everything down on the floor, and then knelt next to the couch. She summoned water into the basin and dipped the washcloth in it.

Wiping the professors' wounds proved a tedious job, and Hermione's mind wandered. She offhandedly admired the lithe woman's form. Then her thoughts ran to Snape. He was a hard man, in the figurative and literal sense. His nose wasn't actually a beak as many students had assumed. If you actually looked at it you could see that it had just been broken one too many times. The lines that seemed permanently etched in his face actually diminished a great deal when he wasn't in the classroom, and he had a strong jaw line. All in all with a haircut he'd be good looking with a little attention to hygiene.

She stopped that train of thought before it started. She forced herself to think of the other woman in the room. She'd talked to her about things that she hadn't spoken to anyone about. Why'd she done that? Maybe it was because she was brought up to tell the truth first. She would've attributed it to that if she could but every time she tried it left a piece of her mind wriggling in doubt. Maybe it was because Amethyst seemed like an honest person? Every avenue of thought left either something to the imagination or it left Hermione uncomfortable because it either meant that she'd been persuaded or she'd gone soft.

She then thought about what they'd talked about. Had her father turned her into a whore? She thought of sex as an answer. Maybe he had. Maybe she would turn into the woman asking the man to leave the Knut on the nightstand. But nothing was concrete. Nothing was definite, and Hermione, for the first time in a while, wanted those definitive answers.

She startled out of her thoughts when she realized Snape had turned his head towards her and she'd unconsciously followed the wounds to Professor Sertlin's chest. Luckily, the wounds here were superficial and didn't trail far enough down to necessitate the removal of any clothes. She moved to her arm and muttered a low curse.

"Professor Snape?" She asked not looking up, when he didn't respond she tried again.

"Professor Snape?"

He startled and focused on her. "Yes?"

"I can't heal her wrist, sir." She said quietly. He looked at her, and realized she was exhausted. He didn't know the ramifications with pregnancy and sleep, however he saw the dark circles under her eyes deepen, the sallow shade of skin begin to rival his own. She should be resting; she shouldn't have to deal with petty fights because of his inability to control his emotions, and he didn't need his ward draining herself when he was still in the same room.

He cleared his throat as he saw her begin to sway slightly. "I believe I can take over from here and do what you cannot, if you'll allow me, Miss Granger?" He lifted a sardonic eyebrow, and then belatedly wished he hadn't. Her eyes welled with tears she tried to fight. He quickly saw her expression turn to one he didn't understand, and he gently let a small wisp of his legilimency brush only the forefront of her mind.

_Why should it surprise you? You're nothing! You mean nothing to everyone! Your knowledge is failing you and where will you turn? Ha! Trying to raise a baby! It'll grow to hate you too. Just as your friends have, just as the Headmaster has learned to. Just as the only bloody man you trust. You mean nothing! It would be better without you here. And Severus bloody Snape as your savior is an almost laughable plight in itself. He fed you because you're too incompetent to do it yourself._

More splintered thoughts came his way. He was almost drowning in her self-loathing, and he pulled back carefully. He looked at her face and realized if someone didn't do something to stop this soon she would fall into that hole. He took Amethyst's wrist gingerly and healed it. Granger was still standing there not seeing anything around her. Everything else was healed, so he covered the unconscious professor, and turned to his most recent plight. He finally had a thought, one that would have worked on Chelsea.

"Miss Granger." She turned her head towards him.

"Yes, Professor Snape?" She sounded fragile.

"I need your assistance. I assume that is not disagreeable?" He found he had to work for the harsh 'professor' tones that he had perfected over the years.

"No, Professor." Still she showed no reaction.

"Fine." He managed to ground out. He wondered if he'd been the one to completely break her. Remembering his earlier assessment of her health he went into his rooms he grabbed a heavily diluted pepper up potion and walked back to the doorway, almost running over Hermione in the process. He could see the energy it had taken her to get to his doorway. He handed her a carefully measured dose of the potion. "Take it." He said, and she slowly but steadily drank it. He didn't know why she'd trusted him, but was severely disheartened to see her do so with no qualms or questions. She was that bloody submissive dog again. "Come." It didn't take him much to growl the last.

He led her into his private labs pointed her towards a chair and waited until she was seated.

"Miss Granger, prepare a strengthening draught."

"How much do you need me to brew, Professor?"

"Only enough for one vial, I assume she won't need any more before it expires." He answered honestly.

He saw a faint glimmer of life leech back into her eyes. "Who am I brewing for?"

"Obviously, the unconscious Miss Sertlin," The name tasted like acid on his tongue.

"She can't take it." Her tone brooked no argument...

"I assure you, although there are better students, your brewing spells are competent enough." When she made no move to get the supplies, he turned to her. "What?" he hissed.

He glared, and growled, "Explain."

"They're the poster children for homeopathy. Their bodies are simply not made to use things which are processed. The base of the concentrate is a thing that's not natural enough for her to tolerate." Her eyes, for the first time since she'd been back, held a faint shimmer of the knowledgeable light which had bothered him all these years.

He gritted his teeth and forcibly stopped the scathing comment that came so naturally, and then took a breath. "How is it you know this?"

"I spent most of my free time hoping to be anything other than I am. Being an elemental would allow me to escape, and so I read up on it." She seemed to make it less than it was, but he took it. He took the evasion because that light was growing.

He realized he may know how to fix her.

"You're aware that all the professors have been instructed to take an apprentice this year?" He asked, a plan formulating in his mind.

"Yes, that's why you agreed to take me as your mock apprentice, so I'd have an excuse for the classes I wouldn't be able to take. But, it's also so you didn't have to take a real apprentice." She had been told that by McGonagall, Harry and Ron. They'd tried to get her to apply to different teachers.

He nodded. "What do you plan to do once you are out of school?"

Her face pinched and she replied bitterly. "I'll be a mother and a wife, Professor. I'll be married to a man whose only example of wives is that they stay home and raise Quidditch teams. I will be doing exactly that."

He looked at her and realized she didn't have a choice. She'd gone from a man who'd controlled her, to a boy who'd do the same given the chance. She reminded him of a cat at that moment, a cat that hated cages and was being let out only to be put back in again.

"What if I said I'd help you in that area, plus give you an actual apprenticeship." he paused, drawing it out. "If you teach me all you know about elementals, and…" It wasn't a fair trade, and he knew she'd point that out. Grasping at straws he said the first thing that came to mind. "I, unfortunately, am not omniscient, and I have need of a watchful pair of eyes… I need to know someone's true intentions on being here."

She looked scandalized. "Who's?"

The only one who he could think of that would go along with a façade like this was in the next room. "Amethyst's."

"Professor Sertlin?" She stared at him. "Why?"

"I hardly think that is any of your business."

"I thought you loved her sister."

He blanched, "I cared for them both in different ways. Do you agree or not."

"I'm hardly able to watch her constantly."

"Do your best and you get a continued education and a qualified mediwitch to watch your child." He growled. If she said no he would just tell the headmaster he'd tried his best, that she just…

His musings were cut off as she answered. "You'd have to answer questions, and possibly act a little less… abrasive."

Bloody hell she was going to take this as she had that insipid house elf campaign. "Fine." He ground out.

"How will I work with the potions if I can't breathe any of the fumes in?"

"Maybe I was wrong in offering you this position. I assumed you knew of the bubblehead charm." He scathed.

"I didn't know if it would be sufficient, sir." She recoiled visibly.

He mentally smacked himself. Of course she didn't know. It wasn't taught as a safety charm.

"Do you agree?" He asked hoping to bring her back.

"I'd planned to apply for an apprentice with you when this year was over."

"Then you'll get what you want."

"But with a baby, and a husband I'll have to clear it with." She sighed, it was finally out, but only part of the reason she didn't want to marry Ron.

"Then do it for now." He sighed. He hadn't known what answer he wanted until he was fighting for it, and then he knew he not only wanted her to have the light back. He wanted to bring it back to stay, if only because he couldn't for Chelsea. He allowed himself a moment to mourn, then became the composed potions master again.

"You'd allow me to drop my apprenticeship if I was not allowed to continue?" She asked incredulous.

"Yes."

"Then I'll do it, Professor." She smiled.

"I'll ask the headmaster to perform the bonds tomorrow. I expect only the best from an apprentice, which is exactly why I haven't taken any before. Tell me exactly what I am adding to the mixture and what medicinal properties that product has."

He took out a dry metal bowl and began grabbing ingredients out of his supply closet laying them on the counter as he went. He allowed his fingers to touch each, make sure they were fresh.

He pinched a bunch of leaves and added them to the bowl.

"That was peppermint leaves. They're used for gastro-intestinal problems mainly; side uses would be as a decongestant, to prevent headaches, and to treat anxiety caused from depression. You grabbed a pinch of both alfalfa and nettle, both used to supplement calcium, iron, and vitamin c. Oat straw, which I believe you just grabbed is high in vitamins, but is commonly used as a nerve tonic. Lemon balm, used normally to treat either gastrointestinal problems, or mild depression. Raspberry leaf can be used for wounds, respiratory problems, or overall wellness in pregnancy." She said with precision.

He added water to the mixture and in one graceful movement of his arm, his wand was out and he heated the mixture, bringing it to a rolling boil. Soon the mixture was thick and gave a plume of flavorful steam.

"Grab a mug, Miss Granger." He said removing the spell from the cauldron. She did as he was told and handed it to him. He grabbed a mason jar and he could tell that she didn't recognize the clear syrup mixture.

"I don't know what that is." She sounded disappointed.

"I didn't expect you to. It's a mixture of sugar and water called simple syrup."

He transfigured the bowl into a teapot and filled the mug. He added two spoonfuls of the syrup before handing it to her. "Now drink."

"I thought this was for Miss Sertlin." She said looking at him oddly.

"She will have some as well. Take it." The dour man ground out.

She took it and cautiously took a sip. He could see her inhaling the steam and relaxing minutely.

"What do you know of the new class, Miss Granger?"

She swallowed the mouthful of tea and responded. "Only that you'll be teaching it, and other students will be under a spell or a potion to simulate a pregnancy."

He sighed. "I developed a potion when I found out about Chelsea's condition that would replicate her pregnancy in another person. The students in advanced potions will have a chance to partake in the class, with parental permission. After I have the number of students who will be in the class I will gather women who've had children previously and collect blood. You'll help me make the potion, and differentiate what vial goes to what student. All students, including you, will have to keep a journal about the changes in their body, in their psyche, and in their magic. The students will all be at various stages in pregnancy, about six weeks separating the extremes. It all depends on how much false unicorn root I put in the mixture, which is the only ingredient that is added right before it reaches the students lips. Simulators will be given out to the mothers for half of a term, then to the fathers for the same duration. Then everyone will get a break for the rest of the duration of the pregnancy. After the 'birth' you'll be living 'as a family', with partner and child, until the end of school.

"Unfortunately, Albus has deemed it necessary for a female teacher to take equal control of the classes. Miss Sertlin was picked as she has only a slightly heavier class load than I. She'll have an apprentice that will major in child development and DADA. Unfortunately you'll have to share in the spotlight of piloting the course with whoever she picks."

She thought for a moment. "I think that's actually a good idea. I mean we're going to be discussing the changes in our body with the teacher of that class. I really don't think a lot of the students in this are going to be comfortable telling you that their breasts are swelling, or they're having cravings for bleach."

"Bleach?"

"It's a muggle cleaning product." She said.

"I know what it is. I just wasn't aware People had cravings for bleach." He asked.

"It's almost always a marker for a dietary deficiency, but yes, people can and do crave bleach, ammonia, dirt, or any number of other disgusting or poisonous things. I really don't think that the majority of your students will think it's acceptable to come to you with something like that."

He made a gruff sound, then hearing his clock chime twice, sighed and said "Go to bed Miss Granger. It's early and we have to introduce the class tomorrow. We can meet after breakfast and finish discussing the class."

She nodded. "Thank you for the tea, Professor."

She slowly walked out of the lab.


	7. When had I ever been brave?

Dear readers,

A year… It's been a little less than a year since I've updated. That year has proven to be quite interesting. I'm going to bore you with personal problems for a bit. February met a man, fell in love quite hard, quite quickly, and moved in after two short months. Unfortunately some bits of news are the secret-that-was-best-kept-hidden. Now comes the sad part, dear readers (few though they may be), my story, my first chapter in particular, is literally that. My story. It was believable because it's what I went through. I wrote it down without the goriness, and just enough for people to realize that this happens and that this is NOT okay. This is what I was still going through until March 2010. I should probably edit that, it's wasn't my story after her looking at the book. No one found out, not while it was still going on. Like I said, met the guy… he met my parents… said I love you. Logical progression on speed. I moved in and hated the fact that I'd kept this secret from him. I'd told him that I'd been abused, but never by whom. Eventually he asked, and tired, so tired, of the little lies, I told him. He reacted better than I would've imagined. (By that I mean he allowed me to circumvent him when he was murderous) I told my mother in June. She reacted well at face value, but I can tell you as a person who'd valued familial bonds above anything else, I am utterly alone. She's still with him, and everything is fine. The guy I loved realized eventually every lie I'd told him and it quickly undermined our entire relationship. He's still a friend, which is more than I can hope for, but… Unrequited loves a bitch. Anyway, moving out, trying to get set up on my own, trying to keep myself out of the dissociative pit after everything was taking most of my time and effort. I apologize I couldn't write, I couldn't think. I even stopped responding to my beta, which is my next letter; hopefully she'll forgive me, even if she isn't able to beta anymore. I'm writing this longwinded explanation to say I haven't stopped writing, and even though the writing got more fantastical as I got more frantic, I'm going to continue on and hopefully level it out. The next chapter is halfway through the outlined plot, so that should be up soon, unbeta'd.

Now a word to the wise… I'm twenty now… It'd been going on since I was twelve, with my step father. My mom saw it, my mom asked me about it, but she'd asked him first… and he told me to lie. If you suspect something ask the CHILD as soon as it enters your mind. As delicately as you want, adopt slytherin tactics even. I have a long road ahead of me trying to cope with what's been done to me, and I was fortunate enough to not have the responsibility of a life created out of this, but some aren't as fortunate as I was. I still suffer from a lot of the effects from childhood abuse, who would you condemn to this? I beg you to check out RAINN or another rape crisis organization. I told two of my friends when I was 16. Because of my protests it never came out then, I believed my mom would hate me and blame me and damn if I wasn't right. It took a stranger, a man I'd known for 6 months at max to coerce me into admitting this. If anyone knows someone who this is happening to try and coerce them to get out, and if you need a bit more help, I'm an e-mail away. I think that's it for now…

Lauren


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